Saturday, September 22, 2007

Squeezing too tight


Today is another day where I spent half of my Saturday in the workshop, so far its has been 3 straight week that I have been in the workshop every Saturday. No, my car is not a common problematic Proton ;). Its an old 17 year old Mercedes Benz 190e. It was passed down to me from my parents for me to use to go to UPM. We fixed the rear shock absorber because it was not working, the car was lowered even though there is no passenger in the rear seat. Now the arms that are holding the spring and shock absorber have reached its maximum use. The car creaks like an old house, whenever the rear left wheels hit a bump. Oh yeah the total cost for the absorber is RM470 : o....

At least I don't have to pay it, my Research assistant salary is only enough for me to ride a motorcycle, but since the car is at home, just sitting there, might as well used it right and keep it in a good condition. It's a Mercedes dammit, and its one of the previous models that were labelled indestructable, because it can last up to years (in my case 17 years of abuse) with out failing. Although there have been problems here and there, but its better than getting a crappy new old Proton Saga (that car has been around even longer than my Mercedes, over 20 years, they just keep producing it because Malaysians like cheap aerobacks : p)

Anyways I been taking a lot of useless pictures with my new digital camera, and perhaps if I rajin to edit the ugly (or x rated one ;) ) to be posted here. I have two blogs which are the same, which is blogger.com and friendster.com, but it seems I can't load pictures to the friendster blog. Anyhow the camera is a Samsung brand and it has all the feature I want, including anti shake and video that records audio too. So ok lah, I started a collection of video diaries, and when I looked back at it, it reminds me of those reality TV shows where they have a confession room and you spill your guts out. Anyway it a great way for me to be vain and reflect at my self literally ;)

I have these cycles of should I say obsessions. Its either video games, hair, or relationships. Right now all 3 seem to be working together against me. I loved playing The Sims2 because its fun to be able to be a different character in a game and either messed up or strive for the best in their lives. I colored my hair about a month ago, and its started to turn oranged a bit, it used to be beige sand ash ... or something now it just looks orange. I would blame for the frequent shampoo, but I have to because I have a dandruff problem. If I don't wash my hair every other day, flakes would be flaking off my scalp. I think its just nasty to have dandruff, I always try to check for dandruff but some time it will fall without me noticing it and then I would like freak out (EEEWWW gross mathafuker).

Right now I am also the relationship obsession stage, I only knew this person via sms and yet I have been smsing this person like crazy. If I were in the other line I would think, this guy is mental lah, always smsing me everyday. I can't help it, I am pretty bad at relationships, I always liked being solo and free but sometimes I also want to be with someone, but then sometimes I feel smothered in a relationship. Another weekness of mine, is I liked to moved the relationship as quickly as possible, meet today, dating tomorrow, married the next day, in bed after that, divorce next week...

Yah crazy, almost like my Sims2 life. I really need to slow down in pursuing someone and let things flow naturally and accept rejection. I have never been a player nor have I been in the dating scene often, heck I don't even like to lepak all that much. I am a homebody, just like to lepak, but then deep inside me I would just love to travel all over the world.

However right now I want to be in a relationship but I am afraid if I squeeze too tight I will loose it, so right now I have to focus on my other obsession so that my relationship or in a clearer context, the courting stage does not falter due to my aggressive and clinging nature.

So if I were to be in one, then it would be a blast but then if it does not happened, I would always have great hair and finally finish off every game I owned.
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